Week four

[letsplayamod]

Two more of your fellow gods, your companions, your friends, have met their end together. As you turn in for the night, and a new week dawns upon you, it's starting to be a bitter experience. Just how much of this will you be forced to take?

But all isn't just despair. The morning is brighter than the last. The storm clouds that previously plagued almost every day have dissipated, and this week brings plenty of sun and a friendlier breeze. Not to mention, another floor of this strange temple has revealed itself. Whatever lies within is your domain, not Typhon's. Keep it tight in your grasp, because you never know when you'll lose it.

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Quark's Bar

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[taintedfayth]

[His next inhalation is slow, measured; the resulting exhalation equally so.]

... my mother loved me in her own way. She did what she thought was best.

[But oh, it had been anything but.]

[necromants]

[That seems like the sort of answer that begs to be poked at. Zvei considers leaving it alone, because even he can tell that this is a very loaded topic, but...]

Will you tell me about her? I must admit, I'm rather curious.

[taintedfayth]

[If this were anyone else, he would end this discussion here, or wave it off as being something not worth elaborating on. It's fraught in ways that Zvei truly has no idea of, but perhaps that's exactly why he doesn't leap to change the subject-- because that would be even more suspicious than just continuing.]

Do not misunderstand... she did try to protect me from the cruelty of the world. She sought a way to gain me the acceptance of the people of Spira, but what she ultimately settled upon was...

[Well.]

I told you of the aeons that only summoners are capable of calling upon. I did not tell you of what creates and sustains those aeons.

[necromants]

[Well. That sounds like it's going in a certain (dreadful) direction, but hey who knows, maybe it's just a needlessly ominous setup for something that isn't all that bad after all??]

True, you didn't. What is it that creates them?

[taintedfayth]

The aeons are the dreams of the fayth-- people who sacrificed their lives so that their souls might be sealed away in order to grant the power of those dreams to summoners.

[... yeah, it sure is going in that direction, huh.]

[necromants]

[...yep, there it is.]

Oh dear. So your mother sacrificed herself for yours, then?

[He should probably have a reaction that isn't "morbid fascination" but eh. What do you expect from him, sympathy??]

[taintedfayth]

[A smile, but there's absolutely no joy or humor in it whatsoever. It's the smile of someone who had all of the last remnants of hope snuffed out of them at the age of ten.]

It was a logical decision. She did not have long to live as it was.

[And yet if she had simply let her life end naturally? ... that would have been far, far less painful than having to watch her be turned into a fayth before his very eyes.]

[necromants]

...Fascinating.

[It's out of his mouth before he can stop it, and he's not talking about Seymour's mother anymore. No, it's the look in his eyes, the way his smile is both so oddly calm and unnatural at the same time that captivates Zvei; certainly not the sort of reaction he should be having, and he recognizes that after a moment, blinking and clearing his throat.]

My apologies for your loss. Even so, I can't imagine it was an easy thing to go through.

[taintedfayth]

[No, it most definitely isn't the reaction Zvei should be having. And yet? Somehow to Seymour it's infinitely more palatable than yet another superficial show of pity, or - worse yet - disgust, because he's grown so used to both of those things that he finds them both repulsive in their own ways.

He finds he doesn't dislike it.]

I do not think she considered that part when she made her decision.

[She certainly didn't expect him to have a total breakdown, abandon the pilgrimage and flee back to Baaj without even accepting her fayth!]

[necromants]

[Zvei settles a little, resting his chin on his hand as he considers.]

...Maybe she wasn't really considering how you'd react at all.

[If she was already dying, with not long to live... then perhaps she just wanted to be useful in some way. Perhaps it didn't occur to her that her son would have any problems with it.]

[taintedfayth]

I doubt she was.

[For all that she'd tried, she'd never really understood him... but then, had anyone?]

She thought that giving me the power to defeat Sin would solve all of my problems. But the world is not that simple.

[Oh, to her credit, it was partially thanks to Anima that he had managed to claw his way up to the positions he currently holds, but for the most part? It was his own determination and ruthlessness that had paved that path.]

[necromants]

Some people do have a tendency to see the world in black and white. To think that a solution is simple enough to solve all your problems.

[Pot, kettle. Not that he's really aware of it, though.]

Are you angry at her for what she did?

[taintedfayth]

[The sound Seymour makes is neither a "yes" nor "no" in nature, but rather something unemotionally neutral.]

To what end? What is done cannot be undone. There is little point in bearing a grudge that will ultimately amount to nothing.

[... that isn't a no.]

Besides, I must thank her. Anima has been... most useful to me.

[necromants]

True, I do agree with that. But she can be both useful and irritating in her decision to leave you behind.

[It's not a pointed remark, just a curious one. One he asks because he doesn't understand; because Zvei has no memories of ever having anyone that close to him before. Is anger a driving factor here at all, or is Seymour truly accepting of her decision?]

[taintedfayth]

[It's a question that might have an answer... were Seymour still capable of feeling much of anything at all. Instead, all that remains in that hollow place in his heart is a sort of numb acceptance and resignation.

He'd felt angry once. He'd cried his heart out once. But what was left in its wake is too empty and parched for any genuine feeling to take root.]

Perhaps she was both. I have given it little thought since that day.

[It's a lie, and he knows that Zvei knows it's a lie, and yet he tells it anyway.]

[necromants]

[A lie, but one he'll let Seymour have. There are some things you can never truly be prepared to face, and Seymour already did him the courtesy of not pressing on one such thing once before.]

She's been useful to you, at least. That's always the bright side. Though you do have my apologies for being rather... detached? About the whole thing. I'm afraid emotion has never been my strong suit.

[Likely unsurprising, given how little his expressions have changed from the day he arrived here.]

[taintedfayth]

[But Seymour just shakes his head, the smile playing about his lips now still wry, but a shade more genuine.]

I would not have told you any of these things if it had been.

[This, in contrast, is the honest truth, because sympathy was the last thing he had wanted in response. It's far too late for that, and receiving it now would only have been a bitter reminder of how he was never given it when it would actually have mattered.

So you have my thanks in return. [Then, lightly, casually:] I trust none of this will leave this room, of course.

[necromants]

Oh, of course!

[Like he hadn't even thought about it - because he hadn't. It was never going to leave this room to begin with.]

I am pleased to hear that, though. I'll admit I have a bit of a difficult time telling exactly what sort of responses people want... and I'm not particularly good at pretending to give the ones they usually want to hear anyway.

[There's a brief moment of pause before he exhales; it's dangerously close to a laugh.]

You've no idea how freeing it's been to actually be myself around you.

[taintedfayth]

[Seymour actually does laugh, because he's the polar opposite-- he has made an art out of learning what people want to hear and when they want to hear it, and then dispensing platitudes accordingly. It's what he's largely been doing here, even, and he wonders if Zvei has picked up on that fact.

He suspects he has.]

The actors must play their parts while on stage... but they are not on stage at all times. There is no need to act out a role when you are in front of me.

... and I trust the same holds true in reverse.

[At this point, he's almost certain it does. He'd just like to hear that confirmation.]

[necromants]

I'd be insulted if you felt the need to act around me after I went to all the trouble of baring my heart to you!

[is that what we're calling that admission now?? okay.]

Know that you never need to play that role around me, and that nothing said between us will reach anyone else's ears.

[taintedfayth]

[Didn't he just say you didn't need to play a role, that's some mid-tier scriptwriting right there--]

If things continue as they have, there may come a time when we will need to avail ourselves of this agreement.

[Some of the rest of this group, man... while they may mean well, they also do not understand the meaning of the word 'discreet.' He doesn't trust them not to accidentally leak information by accident...]

Should that happen, I have faith that my trust in you will not be misplaced.

[necromants]

[That gets a soft laugh from Zvei and he offers a hand, as though they truly need to shake on it.]

It won't be. Little as my word may mean here, I do intend to honor it. Besides, I'd rather not cast suspicion on someone so fun!

[And if Seymour should choose to pursue one of Typhon's incentives... well, that's a bridge they'll have to cross if they come to it. He'd rather not sell the man out if he can help it.]

[taintedfayth]

[Seymour takes the hand, mindful of his claws, and gives it a firm shake. It's more symbolic than anything else at this point, really, yet somehow it makes all of this feel just a little bit more concrete.]

Oh? You would cast suspicion on me if I weren't fun? I'm almost hurt.

[It's low-hanging fruit, but also, Zvei set himself up for that one.]

[necromants]

[A shake! He's still eyeing those claws curiously, but the question gets a lighter, louder laugh from him.]

Aww, come now, I've been playing nice, haven't I? They're good enough at working themselves in circles even without my interference, anyway~

[taintedfayth]

[Why do tree people have claws, we just don't know--]

Indeed-- they certainly need no assistance in that.

[It's honestly rather entertaining!!]

Let us hope that ends up being a benefit rather than a detriment... although there could be worse situations than having to rely on you and you alone.